INTRODUCING Friday Dance Party

It's Friday! Isn't that awesome?

So far today I have done the grocery shopping, come home and opened up all the windows to allow the refreshing breeze through the house, cleaned the bathroom, washed dishes, and I'm ready to sit down and rock the blog! My oldest is at childcare, and the little one is sleeping so the time is right.

I have decided that on Fridays I am going to blog with the title 'Friday Dance Party'! This is a celebration of all that is good and has made us dance during the week, literally or figuratively. The idea actually came about one week as I danced around to my own favourite music cleaning - and being grateful for a home to clean and a family to clean and work for. I NEVER thought I'd say this, but I actually have come to appreciate time spent doing housework. As a side note - Natalie loves dancing and keeps saying she wants to dance, and that she is a ballerina... I think I'll be enrolling her in a dance class soon! Anyway, these posts are really about gratitude, which to me is a joyful feeling that kind of makes me want to dance!

So, here is what has been going on at my house lately, (since it's my first blog of the year) and then the things that made me dance!

The past two weeks in our house have been a bit crazy. Last week Jonathan was home sick with a chest infection and although I love having him home,  I would obviously rather he didn't have to be sick. I must admit though that since he was sick I did enjoy taking care of him and working extra hard so he could put is feet up - is that crazy? (I think not) The girls and I have all been a little sick this week, but fortunately not so much as Jonathan. Last weekend we also rearranged the house quite significantly as well as creating a VERY large pile of things to give away / take to Good Will or the Salvos. I'm definitely loving the order that has come/is coming about due to that. 


Here are particular things that have been filling me with gratitude - that dance for joy kind of feeling:

• The feeling of great wellbeing within myself. Not necessarily about physical health, but wellbeing nonetheless.
• My beautiful family. Beautiful smiles and giggles that fill my home everyday.
• Love at home.
• Sweet cuddles with my baby girl for almost an hour one morning this week.
• The laughter that filled my home when my bestie since forever visited, and our kids were having so much fun together.
• The scriptures - this year I am aiming to read the entire standard works and my study has become quite meaningful and a source of strength to me.

So that is a concise list that could have a lot added to it, but they are the things that I thought of first and foremost. Please feel free to write a 'Friday Dance Party' post on your blog (link back with love), or just to comment with some of the things you've been grateful for this week!

Tracey

#reverb12 Day 31 - The LAST one

Take a moment to yourself, somewhere quiet.

Take a deep breath, and if you have the time/space/inclination do something that has significance for you e.g. light a candle, brew a put of your favourite tea, play your favourite music, whatever.

Think back to where you were all those moons ago, on 1 December when you started #reverb12. All the way back then, I asked: "How are you starting?"

Now, I am not going to ask you "Where are you finishing?" because this is not the end. What I want to ask is, "Where are you now?".

You have spent a month honouring everything that has brought you to this place: the highs, the lows, the messy middles, the exuberant rainbows, the turbulent storms, the fresh strawberries dipped in dark chocolate, the too-tight jeans, the unexpected windfalls, the toddler tantrums (theirs or yours!), all of it.

You have thanked each end every one of these things for the things they have taught you and brought you, and fully know that they reside benignly in your physical, emotional and spiritual being. You know know that while they brought you here and will always be with you, there is no reason for them to hold you back any longer.

You are standing where you are, all that you are, splendidly imperfect and right in the middle of this messy delicious life.

Take another deep breath.

Now quickly and without thinking too much about it, finish these five sentences:



2013 is going to be MY YEAR because...

I deserve it! I have much that I can accomplish and I can make it about doing those things.


In 2013, I am going to do...

Good. With my time, and for other people.


In 2013, I am going to feel...

Peace. Confidence. Self-assured.


In 2013, I am not going to...

Spend my time on things that aren't worth my while, and won't help me be the person I want to be.


In December 2013, I am going to look back and say...

I made a difference.

#reverb12 Days 19 - 30

More answers to the #reverb12 challenge:



Day 19 - How did you nourish your beautiful body in 2012? What self-care practices will you take with you into 2013?

Hmm.. I can't say I've done a LOT of caring for my body this year, or in the past generally... but I did start seeing the chiropractor - does that count? It's my way of caring about myself instead of always ignoring all the aches and pains (and there tend to be a lot of them)!

For the new year I want to either get a bike or do a lot more walking! That is difficult since we don't really live in comfortable walking distance of much now and it also means a lot more time management issues... but if the weather is ok, we can just walk for the sake of it when we've got nowhere else to be.  :)



Day 20 - What was lost in 2012? What do you intend to find in 2013?

Lost in 2012? I'm not really sure how to answer this question... I think I lost a lot of self-doubt - that's a good loss!

In 2013 I intend to find more time for other people. I feel that in 2012 I've been so caught up in only just managing my own life - the sweet and not so sweet bits - that I haven't had / found enough opportunities to be there for other people. I'm becoming more aware of this need within myself to know how I can bless others and follow through on that too. :) I have been so blessed by love - the love of family and friends, and through them God's love - and, knowing how it has enriched my life, I honestly want to be able to give that back to the people around me.


Day 21 - What items did you tick off your dream list in 2012? What other, unexpected, dreams came to fruition? What are the top three items on your dream list for 2013?

I think I did more surviving than achieving dreams this year, and I am ok with that! I have done a fair bit of goal setting in the past few months though. I don't know which (if any) of these will come to complete fruition in 2013, but they are things I will be working toward:

- Finishing my SACE

- Doing grade 7 and 8 piano exams and then getting my diploma!

- Jonathan and I will also be working toward buying a house :)

Day 22 - What was the greatest gift you received in 2012? What was the greatest gift you gave? What do you intend to give yourself in 2013?

This year I received the gift of friendship in great abundance. It has been such a blessing to have new friendships develop as well as a strengthening of continuing friendships. I've also been trying to give that same gift to those around me. It is a gift that blesses the giver as well as the receiver! ... and sometimes (more often than not?) you are on both ends of the equation at once! :D

The gift that I intend to give myself in 2013 is... grace. That's all about not expecting perfection all the time - but I've spoken plenty about that so I'll leave it for now. :)

Day 23 - Name three excuses -- stories you tell yourself that are holding you back -- that you are going to let go of in 2013.

Personally, I think I'm pretty good at not giving myself excuses...

Off the top of my head, I do want to stop excusing myself for not taking good enough care of my own body though. As I have mentioned before, I'm going to need it for the rest of my life! So I do need to look at how I'm going to put physical exercise in to my week and how I can further improve my eating habits.



Day 24 - What is the single most important habit you intend to cultivate in 2013?

Single most important? This is another one that I'm struggling to find an answer for... One that I know is important and I need to develop further is the idea of mindfulness or intentionality: being in and enjoying the blessing of the moment. In the past I know I have spent far too much time rushing on to the next thing so that I can conquer that 'to-do list' and not nearly enough time just enjoying everything that is around me. Time to change.



Day 25 - How will you be vulnerable?

The soft white underbelly, the flaw in the armor, the Achilles' heel -- weaknesses are what make us the most human, the most beautiful.
Next year, how will you tend to your vulnerabilities? How will you build them a shelter from the storm? How will you put them through physical therapy? How will you find a way to make them work to your advantage? 

I have issues with vulnerability. I'm not comfortable with it at all. I have always tended to avoid it at all costs. I've had this habit of not even admitting to myself when there are things in my life that are causing me grief/anxiety, etc... Honestly, I know a couple of people who I feel seemed to realise when I was unhappy before I'd even acknowledged it myself... and I would persist in saying that I was perfectly fine - all to avoid vulnerability I suppose.

In 2013, and now, I will be working on trust. Trust in other people will be a shelter of sorts. Fortunately I have a husband who, over the past four years that I've known him, I have learnt to trust and I do confide in. I know I could, if I were willing, extend that trust to others and I intend to do so when I have that need.

And here I am splashing out my vulnerability on to your computer screen!

Day 26 - How do you intend to carve out more time for the things that are the most important to you in 2013?

I have learned, primarily through the example and encouragement of my husband, the importance of goal setting. I've often heard him say, "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail" (or something of the sort).

In 2013 I will be continuing the habit of setting goals and planning for the things that I want to achieve!


Day 27 - How did you make time for creativity in 2012?

Looking back, is there one creative time or one particular creation that stands out for you? (Maybe you could share it here?) How will you continue (or start) making time and space for your creative passions in 2013?

I didn't get to share it with many people, but this Christmas season I wrote an arrangement to one of my favourite Christmas Hymns and I would have to say I'm quite happy with it! It was a fun and rewarding process and I do hope that I will one day have the opportunity to use it and hear it come to life. :)

Since my piano lessons finished for the year (my teacher always breaks over the Christmas holidays) I haven't been practising the piano much at all, but I intend to start that again this week. I want to progress so I make time for it everyday even if that means getting up really early.



Day 28 - Think of three things that daunted you in 2012: how are you going to work towards overcoming them in 2013?

I am enjoying the process of #reveb12... but some of these questions are really hard to answer. I guess that's the point though - you have to really reflect.

Hmm. Sometimes my older daughter's behaviour is quite daunting. My emotions have been daunting at times. :P 'Keeping up' has been daunting too. Maybe I'm not thinking very hard about this question (the 'catch up' on answering them has been time consuming) but they have all daunted me at one time or another. 

I think with anything that daunts you you have to either come up with strategies to change / deal with the situation... or you have to embrace it. Some things that are daunting aren't actually bad, and once you accept them they can become beautiful.



Day 29 - What word did you select to be your travelling companion in 2012? What gifts did this word bring? What word will you choose to guide you through 2013? What do you hope it will bring into your life?

I didn't pick a word specifically for 2012... some words that come to mind that followed me throughout the year are: grow, change and intentional. Intentional has been one of the most important.

For 2013 I would like to use the word courage. Courage to hold fast to moral values. I want to remember that wrong is wrong no matter who is doing it, and that right is right no matter who isn't doing it and to say how I feel.

I want to be remember to be bold - immediately and not at the last possible moment, which is sometimes too late anyway. I want to have courage that will make it easier to stand up for others and to stand alone when I have to. That courage may be borne of knowing that I am never alone anyway.

I hope this courage will also help me to try new things, and to persevere in achieving my goals even in those difficult moments when those goals seem unattainable.

Day 30 - Often we see our life as a humongous journey, and we believe that not only have we not arrived at our far away desired destination, but we also think we must accomplish x, y, and z, before we can declare with satisfaction that we are THERE.
For a moment, take a close look at who you are NOW. See what you can declare.
Merge the past, present, and future into one big ARRIVAL.
Describe joyously and in great celebration the BEING that you ARE. 
(If you like, try writing this in third person as if you were a news reporter and this article about you is appearing in a publication you love and respect.)

Simply, I have arrived at being happy. I don't think that requires a lot of words to explain.
Yes, there are things that are uncomfortable in life. Yes, I have imperfections - there are things I need to change. But the difficult things don't define my life. My imperfections don't define me....

and I can be happy!

Reverb catch up

So, I haven't been keeping up with my reverb posts very well. It started because I felt like some of the questions were the same answers to questions I had already posted, and also there were questions that weren't very interesting to me personally and ones that I didn't know how to answer... and plus I've been just plain busy - but I'm going to hash it out now. :)



Day 14 - The path that brought you here

Today's #reverb12 prompt comes from ... Bron aka Maxabella ... She also rocks this mamahood thing from the zeniths to the nadirs, and if you aren't a part of her 52 weeks of grateful project then you really should be.
Sometimes I spend too long at the end of the year planning for the new year ahead, so something like #reverb12 is so good for me.
This year was so full of change for me and mine that it feels like it wasn't a "good one". While I welcome the fresh breeze that change can bring, too much change just leaves me itchy and skittish, the ground loose beneath my feet. Then, when things settle again and the road ahead looks smooth and delightful, I think - what's next?
But I need to remember to look back at the winding path before I start walking.
My question is: what was the most important thing you learned in 2012?

I would like to add: how does this learning shape the path going forward?

Hmm. The most important thing I learned in 2012? I suppose it was that I am a capable mother, and person generally and that I can make a valuable contribution to my family, friends, and the world around me.

I think sometimes we all have a tendency to feel that our part in the world is so small in the scheme of things and wonder whether we really matter at all, but I know that each of us do! And that's me too, not just everyone else I meet. We can be the change that we want to see in the world.

With this in mind, going forward in 2013 I want to be aware of the ways I can make a difference to those around me... more on this later.  

Day 15 - What tingled your tastebuds?
What was the most extraordinary dish you sampled in 2012? What made it so magical?
It needn't be the most extravagant dish, just the one that knocked your socks off with its flavour, texture, aroma, freshness, colour, significance, timing… whatever. Relive the magic and help us savour it with you here.

A short answer, since I really can't think of much... I don't remember anything that made a particular impression on me - but I am a sucker for creamy pasta with mushrooms, sundried tomatoes, as well as bacon and/or chicken! We had something like that in the past week but we used alfredo sauce instead of just cream and it was even yummier!




Day 16 - Who inspired you?

Who inspired you in 2012? And why?
What gifts did they give you? And how will you carry these forward in to 2013?

Now here is a question I can sink my teeth into! I can think of a few people and I bet that one of them in particular doesn't even realise that she inspires me so much! Without mentioning names, here are the reasons that these people inspired me.

The first I will mention is actually a couple who has been through a LOT this year. They inspired me with their positivity and resilience in the face of these challenges. They have inspired me by the way they just keep putting one foot in front of the other and doing it with grace! <3

The next on my list is a friend who had huge challenges to deal with this year, but has likewise shown resilience and just kept moving forward. I don't think I have once heard her complain about it all!

The people above and also a few other particular friends have also inspired me with the way they seek to help others and are just wonderful people. I've been so blessed to have them in my life.

Most of these people probably wouldn't recognise themselves in what I have written, even if they do read it though.

I hope to carry these things forward, to be able to meet challenges with optimism and grace and to really make a difference to those around me.

Day 17 - How did you make a difference?

Today we are fortunate to have another guest prompt from ... Lana
Think of one person whose life you made a difference to in 2012.
What did you gain from this?
How will you continue to make a difference in 2013?

I love this question - it makes me think. Try answering it for yourself. Really think about the impact you've had on the people and world around you. It doesn't mean you have to get bigheaded about it, but it's important for your self-worth to feel good about the things you've done!

First of all, I haven't always felt that I really do make that much of a difference... but I plan to remember that I can in future!

This year the biggest difference I have made has been within the walls of my own home. It's impossible not to acknowledge or accept that I made a difference in the lives of my little ones. Being a wife and mother, that was always going to happen - for better or worse! ... but I feel it has been for the better. I don't know how comfortable I feel about making a list of the things that give me that feeling of achievement - but I see my children growing and developing and that they are happy and loving individuals and that makes me happy.

This year I think that I've been so caught up in the wife, mother, and housekeeper things and with adjusting to having two children and a husband that works full-time now, that I haven't made/had a lot of time to make a difference outside of those roles. I try to think of the friends I've made and the help I've given... and I hope that it has made a positive difference for those people I've wanted to help! We don't generally put effort in where we don't care about our impact, do we?



Day 18 - The colour of you

What colour best represents the year you had in 2012? And why?
What colour would you like to invite into your life in 2013?
Be as literal or metaphorical, clever or crazy, or just plain off-the-wall with this as you choose! Can't wait to read your responses to this one!

This question makes me laugh, and I'm not really sure how to answer it...

I think green would be a good colour to represent 2012 for me. Green says growth, which I've had a lot of this year. As Natalie like to shout at traffic lights, geen also means GO - which is representative of my year as well. There's been a lot of going and growing!

In one sense, the 'go go go' that the green represents has been good but in 2013 I hope to also use the idea of slowing down and living intentionally, without rushing so much that I fail to enjoy the blessing of that moment. If I follow the theme of the traffic lights, I'll say amber would be a good colour for 2013. Still going and growing, but stopping to enjoy it!

Well, that wasn't as painful and drawn out a process as I thought it was going to be! I'm still enjoying being part of the #reverb12 challenge. If you haven't checked it out go to this blog and if you want to be a part of it, even if you just consider your answers without sharing them, please do!

Reverb days 12 and 13 - emotions and photos

What made you dance in 2012? What made you weep?

Well, a lot of the year really passed by in a blur and I have to really think about... there have definitely been a full spectrum of emotions for me this year though.
To start on the 'what made me weep' end of the scale... I don't know about just 1 moment that was more intense than any other but for me this year, those moments centred around feelings of inadequacy as a mother (and sometimes other things I am doing). Moments when I simply didn't know if I was 'cut out' for it, and felt like I wasn't doing as good a job with everything as I should be, or as someone else was.

As for the 'made you dance' moments... well, in contrast, they're all centred in those moments of clarity where I was able to comprehend just how richly I am blessed. Times where I was in the moment, and just being with and loving my little family. Times when I forgave the myself for the things that weren't done or that I hadn't done well and focused instead on what was done, and done well.

It has also brought a lot of joy to see my little girls developing and being so happy within themselves, and seeing Jonathan come closer to being able to achieve things he has been hoping to do. Most important of all it has been seeing our family dynamics shift as we become closer <3

lol, this has all got me singing, "I can see clearly now, the rain is gone..." haha!



Please post your favourite picture of yourself from 2012, self-portrait or otherwise!

Ok, so I don't think I have a single picture of just myself during the year... I'm only in them with other people, and no - I'm not going to just take a picture of myself now to put on this blog - haha!

So I'm just going to upload a pic of me with my girls.. sadly not many photos of our whole family either :(

I love the way Natalie is looking at Hayley here!

Reverb12 day 11 - Music to Your Ears

I am loving todays question in the Reverb challenge:

What was music to your ears in 2012, literally or metaphorically?


I love you

Other Sweet Nothings, spoken quietly

Natalie saying that she is beautiful - yes!
Natalie telling me that she loves me, or daddy, or Hayley.
Natalie singing
Natalie saying things that show me how much she understands, or wants to know more
Natalie talking, period!

Hayley's contented 'chatting' and her sweet little laugh.

My children laughing and/or playing happily - whether it be on their own, together, with their daddy, cousins, grandparents, aunts, uncles, or other friends... 

Any child's joy for that matter

Hymns

Christmas carols

Hearing my own progress in playing the piano and being told that I passed my grade 6 exam


There are probably many other things that I could write here that were also good to hear... but in the few moments that I have, these are the things that matter.

Reverb '12 days 9 and 10

What was the best book you read in 2012, and why? (And by "Why?" I mean: Why did you read it? And why was it your favourite? Although these answers could be one and the same...!)

So, initially I wasn't even going to answer this question because I couldn't think of much I had read this year, but as I went to write a comment to that effect I did think of one!

Going with books I hadn't read prior to this year, the best thing I've read was Learning Dispositions. When I began reading it and attending the class where I got it, I really didn't think it would be as big a deal to me as it ended up being. But it ended up being the best book for me because it has really helped me a lot as a mother. I can look at behaviour that we tend to think of as 'naughty' and I can now be a lot calmer while still setting boundaries and see what my daughters are trying to communicate, as well as how I might better direct them to put their Purposefulness and Persistence or Confidence or Resourcefulness, etc. to a positive use. I can see that all behaviour has meaning and I know what I can do to help them develop skills that will benefit them throughout their lives and help them be life long learners.

It's really hard to explain just what this book has given me as a parent, but it has given me a lot.



What was the greatest risk you took in 2012? What was the outcome?

Another difficult question to answer.. and even as I began typing this I didn't know what the answer wiould be... and now I this is the question I don't want to answer, but in the spirit of my thoughts about this question, I guess I will!

It's really been a less risky year than other recent years for me... 2009 I got married and in 2010 and 2011 I gave birth... this year nothing major like that, lol!

I guess I have taken a different type of risk this year... in being more open about my experiences since becoming a mother (without wanting to be overly public about it...) I have felt a lot of vulnerability in doing so, but it has also has given me more reason to look for the good, be grateful, and embrace joy and left me feeling more capable, confident, resilient and stronger all round. It's been a risk worth taking - I am loving my family and my life and everything in it right now!